Life Goes On- The Village

As a mother, daughter, sister, friend, family, and part of the community as a whole, it is indeed The Village that is intertwined in living.

If I were just me, and had no other titles, I would be part of a different 'tribe' as my son puts it. And yet, I am part of all the 'tribes' that my titles carry. What an enormous gift that I have been given. To be part of a family teaches us lessons that are part of who we become when we are a family unit. Family includes those that we love, as I love my son, who comes from another mother.

To say that I am great doctor or scientist, would be an untruth. And, thus I have no way of judging whether a person who is a doctor or scientist, to be a great one. Moreover, I have no right to judge or determine the character of someone, whatever their place in this world. Especially important is to learn empathy for those who we come into contact with every day. Reach out, say hello, smile, because it may be the only contact that person has with anyone else.

In my work, I am honored to meet people who are so genuine, so loving and are some of the people others pass, or avoid, and even judge because of the way they look or where they are in life. What a lost opportunity. A village has many different people and they are all humans; who need care and love and respect.

No one deserves the right to feel superior to another and indeed, they are as close to those they scoff. In a moment, their lives changed and when they need those who are around them, they are part of the invisible mass.

My part as a mother is to teach my son, the empathy of which I speak. To love the unlovable, to touch the untouchable, to reach out and make a difference. My son, believes in his tribe. He has many people in this tribe and an even larger village with so many people who love him, unconditionally.

Life goes on and the village may change, but all are welcome, each adding their own color to the pattern.

HeartMommy Pendant

HeartMommy Glass and Diamonds
Originally uploaded by HeartMommy

The HeartMommy Pendant is a silver piece, with red glass/resin and a stone in the belly-button.

Any color glass is available and any stone can be put in the belly-button for the perfect unique piece.

Having my son on December 26th, 2002 with his birthmother was the most magical of days. This design is taken from a sticky note doodle I carried for nearly four years before it was made into one piece of jewelry for Kim.

This is the second design and is one that I love so much.

Kim is my angel and Garrett is my love. He makes the world a better place by being here. I adore him completely.

My Invisible Flowers in an Invisible Vase

What is the impact of my father's departure?

Every year, I dream that my father will send me flowers because he loves me. Every year, I receive my invisible flowers in an invisible vase. They are a bittersweet reminder that my father chose to leave his four daughters. He left us physically, financially and emotionally. The crater left on me and all of my family would swallow up the moon and still have room to spare.
My Dad was my dream man! He was smart, funny, handsome, and an adventurer. My love of animals, travel, inventing things and creating ideas all began with my Dad. He set the standard for all men in my life. And with his departure, the standard was burned in my heart.

I have never recovered completely from my Dad leaving and I never will. My choices in men have lead to the eventual departure of each of them in one way or another.

I call my story, Trifeca. Three of the most important men in my life have left me. All three are now dead. My High School boyfriend died in a car accident in 1985, my Dad died in 1992 and my husband died six months later in 1993. How could they?

My dad was my hero and when he left me at the age of 13, I tried to be tough, became ultimately shy and withdrawn, and then over compensated by being gregarious, funny, smart, and available to 'dangerous' boys.

My first true love was a gorgeous person, smoky, mysterious, loving, kind and then he died. He chose to drink and ride with another boy who was also drinking and driving. He left me when I was 17 years old.

My Dad, long ago moved away from us, developed COPD in his fifties. We had only begun what I decided was our journey back to love. He was quickly dying and after Hurricane Andrew hit Florida, he left his home in the Florida Keys to come back to North Florida. 30 days later he died. He left me permanently when I was just 26 years old.

My husband, the light of my life, the sun and the moon, my world, promised me that he would stand by me forever. We eloped on a Wednesday at lunch and lived as freely as two dolphins at sea. Six months after my Dad died, he died in an accident. He left me forever when I was 26 years old.

So each year, I wait for those flowers to come, and they come as clear as the air. The impact of these three flowers as painful each time they arrive; or not.