B.G. and A.G. - December 26th

Becoming a Mom, Mother, Mommy and HeartMommy is something I nearly removed from my 'calling card story'. On December 26th, 2002 my beautiful, beautiful son, Garrett, was born. He was on his way on Christmas day, but the best gifts are those we wait for, sometimes for years.

His Mom, 1st Mom, Birthmom and TummyMommy, gave birth and after 4 days in the hospital, she handed me my son. So many emotions! Joy, Excitement, Fear, Saddness, WOAH!, and all the things new parents experience, plus the knowledge that we would be leaving with our son. She and his birthfather, both amazing and uber-smart college freshmen, would be leaving to go back to 'life' and move on...

B.G- Before Garrett-consisted of me, us, dogs, WORK, traveling, working 80+ hours a week to earn more to have more. B.G. also included the Infertility Experiments endured to create something that God had already planned.

A.G.- After Garrett- mind-blowing, heart bursting LOVE. Intense, no more experiments, more dogs, a lot more family and saddness too.

Saddness; how does a woman, who loves her unborn child, make the excruciating decision to surrender her child into the arms, home and heart of another mother? Profound Strength of courage, mindfulness, love and extreme understanding.

As this Christmas season is upon us, I always return to December 25th when I got the call, and the moment I saw him for the first time. Garrett, his own unique person from the start. His birthparents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, great grandparents, are all a part of his life; still today. For this I am eternally grateful. My saddness has turned to compassion for all who make this incredible decision and allow 'Us' to become parents.

B.G.- Before Grace

A.G- Attained Gratefulness

My little-big man, is all the best of Kim and Steve! He is all the best of me and his Dad, too.

His life is complex, interesting and he is the Heart of it; he knows nothing else.

When I recently asked him, "How does it feel to be adopted?"

He answered, "It feels like nothing, normal, I am Garrett."

Simple. He is GARRETT!

A.G.- Absolutely Genius

And Time Is The Only Constant

Today, I ran across this photo of my now 9 year old son. Being a photographer gives me reason to take thousands of photos and in some cases, I do not really "SEE" them for years.
This photo clearly shows my son at about three years old, gleeful after having a kiss from his favorite person, his Nana. Her bright pink lipstick is a tell tale sign AND his amazing excitement over the most precious moment.
My Mom is now 71 years old and still wears her signature color pink. My son is not having ANY kisses at this point; he is way to old for that he says.
I love his eyes and their sweet, youthful, exuberant joy! He is so happy and I hope that he continues to have this feeling throughout his life. As he gets older, his eyes see things and his ears are filled with things that are not the fairytale life I would wish for him. But, he still sees things with an open and loving heart, amazing wonder and joyful learning.
As his mother, I too see things through his eyes. For this I am eternally grateful.
This year is one of new horizons, growth, release, and reconnecting with my roots.
With childlike wonder, I embark on this new chapter in our lives. My son, clearly at the root of all my decisions, will see some amazing things and have the chance to 're-meet' his family and friends.
My life is truly blessed. Dreams are alive. Truth and love do win.
Cotton Candy, Rainbows and Ponies...beaches, sunsets and dolphins too. I LOVE IT!

We are an official word- TummyMommy

So, as strange as life would have it. I sent in three words for consideration as part of the english language; HeartMommy, HeartDaddy and TummyMommy.

Well, it is true, TummyMommy, was indeed chosen as an official word!

Can you stand it!?!

My whole life I have been an inventor of sorts. An artist, writer, photographer, designer, Mom and now the official originator of the word, TummyMommy.

Now, mind you, it is not me who came up with the word or its meaning. So, for us- Kim and her Mom and me and all the TummyMommys in the world, CHEERS!

I am so excited! A word, in the english language...and so it goes...

A boy A Dog and A Stick

On the 4th of July, we had the privilege of going hiking with Lyca. She is the newest family member of a dear friend. Lyca is no ordinary dog, she is a human in dog gear. She poses, acts and responds like a dog only to appease those of us who need that extra special DOG love in our lives.
G and Me have always had a dog in our lives. There was Wiley, Buddy, Mattie, Penny and Chloe. All whom have gone to DOG heaven except for Chloe.
In my opinion, every child should have a dog, or a pet to love. In return, they learn to care for something outside of themselves, get unconditional love from their dog, and learn that there is pure joy in the simple things in life.
A very important first walk on the lease, to a magical waterfall, with a hiking stick, down a country road...it puts a little purpose in the step. Proud and intensely focused on making way to enjoy this moment of boyhood.
With my keen mother's eye and my loverly lens, I caught this moment in time. I smile. G and Lyca, alone, with each other to adventures yet found.
What a wondrous and wonder-filled day. Independence, freedom and all that it implies.

100 Best Adoption-Friendly Workplaces For 2009

In 2002, when I became a Mom through adoption, having a company that was adoption friendly made the experience less stressful in several ways. I worked for Accenture, LL.P., a large IT Consulting firm. As an employee, I was treated just as any new parent. One of the ways that Accenture assisted me was through an adoption program giving adoptive parents up to $4,500 towards adoption expenses.


Dave Thomas, the founder of Wendy's Hamburgers, was adopted at six months old and is remembered not only for his restaurants but for his commitment to adoption.


The 3rd annual Dave Thomas Foundation - 100 Best Adoption Friendly Workplaces was released and below are the top 10 companies.

1 Wendy's International, Inc.
2 Citizen's Financial Group, Inc. / RBS Americas
*3 way tie*
3 Liquidnet
3 LSI Corporation
3 United Business Media LLC (UBM)
**********
6 Subaru of America, Inc.
7. Bowen Engineering Corporation
8. Timberland
9. Barilla America
10. Time Inc.

You can read more about it at:
http://www.davethomasfoundation.org/Our-Work/Adoption-Friendly-Workplace/Best-Adoption-Friendly-Workplaces-List-(1

It is hard to believe that adoption is so costly. However, the hard truth is that a private/agency domestic adoption costs in the range of $15,000 to $40,000 depending on the agency and the circumstances of the adoption. There is no simple formula used and as a person who wants to be a parent; having tried all the other options, adoption is often the only and best choice, regardless of the costs.

Becoming a parent is so amazing and when you have become one through adopton, the costs pale in comparison to the joy you feel with your child in your arms. The costs nearly dissapear from your mind and yet, as a new parent, the costs of having a child change everything.

Being provided the adoption benefit with Accenture deferred some of the costs and thus the stress associated with the that process. Many companies offer adoption benefits. If you are in the process or considering adoption, investigate these options. Ask your Human Resources department about what benefits are offered and understand the laws regarding your rights as a new parent.

It is imperative that you be proactive in the search for adoption related benefits, whether through the company you work for or through other sources. Dependant on your personal circumstances, there are many ways to defer costs, have a leave of absence and other options specific to your employer.

For more information on adoption, the laws and benefits of adoption, please visit The National Center for Adoption Law and Policy at http://www.law.capital.edu/adoption/.

Now, six years later, my son is a vibrant, loving child who changed my world forever. He is part of me. There is no other option than knowing he is my son. All that was before him is of little consequence. He is my child and I am so grateful for my joy in him.

The Banyan Tree and it Grows

As a 'non-traditional' family, my son and I are more than a family tree. We are a banyon tree.

A Banyon tree is one that grows from one tree trunk, has branches that reach out and then the tree grows hanging vines. After hanging and growing over the years, they reach the ground and start a new tree trunk.

In essence, the tree continues to grow and spread, not just by the branches alone, but by the many new trunks that are formed.

My son is adopted. He has a birth-mother and her family. He has a birth-father and his family. He has a HeartMommy and my family and he has a HeartDaddy and his family.

These are four trunks that have already grown from his existence; amazing and beautiful. Imagine all the lives he has touched by being a part of each of our lives. And each time he touches one of us, we start to grow a vine that eventually hangs down, reaches the ground and a new base is formed. Everlasting.

I thank God everyday for the gifts he has given me. He has created new life in through one soul. He has brought together so many people who may have never known each other.

Thank you to my Banyan Tree Family.

Liza Needs a Forever Family

Good Friday to everyone!

Recently, a friend sent me a posting about a Russian orphan named Liza.
Liza is part of a group of orphans being hosted in the US with the hope of being adopted into forever families.

My first instinct is to drive to Atlanta, pick her up and be her HeartMommy. As I have processed everything, it may be that I was contacted to be a voice for Liza.

Please click on the link below to read the news story and watch the video about Liza and the other orphans who will return to Russia next week.

http://www.11alive.com/news/local/story.aspx?storyid=125459&catid=39

To learn more about New Horizons and how their organization helps children in need, please visit their website http://www.newhorizonsforchildren.org/.

As we think of our world, the intense need of love for children, and the many people who want to be parents, please consider passing this along. Or if you are one of the people like me who wanted to be a Mom, consider alternate options when it comes to adoption and the love that you have to share.

Warmly,
Nancy
HeartMommy

HeartDaddy- the Answer in 2009

The Sky knows no limits.

As HeartMommy gets a bit of exposure, I am asked on a regular basis about the idea of HeartDaddy. And here is the answer...

In May of 2008 my son came to me and said, we must have "HeartDaddy" too for all the Dads in the world. Of course, we must, I agreed.

On that day Garrett and I sat down for our first business meeting. Across our makeshift desk we shared; Garrett exlpained the finer points of his idea, business plan, and drew the HeartDaddy logo for me. It is lovely indeed.

After the meeting ajorned I purchased the domain name- www.heartdaddy.com and put all the important documentation in the newly labeled file for HeartDaddy.

Isn't fun to know that my son loves HeartMommy handing out my business cards more than I do, and that he has the smarts to come up with the idea, the branding, and all the details for HeartDaddy too.

My ideas are small in comparison to his imagination and fearlessness. Garrett knows only what is possible.

And with that, I give you, HeartDaddy. Created in May 2008 by Garrett Cushman for all the Dads of the world.

All the great ideas I get from Garrett, friends, family, customers, Dads and Moms are noted, reviewed, and are 'in development' for the next phase of business.

With HeartMommy just out of the incubator, HeartDaddy is being carefully cared for as we grow.

In 2009 we are expecting amazing growth and expansion of HeartMommy and the launch of HeartDaddy!

Please send me any and all thoughts, ideas, wishlist items and I will add them to the executive meeting agenda for next week. Garrett and I hold our meetings at our now makeshift desk in the kitchen, where most great ideas and stories are shared.

I am sending an email to my web designer to add a new link on HeartMommy.

Look often and spread the word about HeartMommy and HeartDaddy so we will continue to grow as 2009 becomes our banner year!

Thank you to all the amazing people who have and continue to support us.
We are the Little Engine That Could and Will!

Nancy
HeartMommy on behalf of HeartDaddy 2009

Garrett's Birthday

Here we are on December 26th, the day after Christmas. All the presents unwrapped, all the toys played with and strewn about, and all the leftovers.

But for me today is the day I became a mother. December 26th is the day that Garrett arrived on this earth. Late last night he could not sleep knowing that his birthday was coming; just as excited as for Christmas morning. We talked about when I met him while still in Kim's womb and how I got to see his picture from the sonogram, but only his head. We discussed how he became Garrett because of a dream that I had about two days before he was born. The names picked out for the baby were Emily Grace if the baby was a girl and Ethan William is the baby was a boy. But, I had this dream that said his name was Garrett, and he is Garrett through and through. During our conversation, he asked me if I knew what his name meant. I played along and asked him to tell me. "Brave Warrior" he said proudly. It is true.

In the early morning hours of December 26th, I received a call from Kim's mother Wendy. She said come now, the baby is coming. FLYING out of the bed and into the car, racing to the hospital and seeing Kim was surreal. The nurse came in and explained what was happening and that only two people could be in the labor/delivery room. Kim asked me if I would be her birth coach! I nearly fell over with joy, holding back my tears to not break the seal on the welling up. After two hours of intense pushing, I could see the very top of Garrett's head. But, Kim's labor would not progress and Garrett was stuck. The doctor decided it was time for a cesarean and they whisked her away. I was not allowed in the operating room. Then the tears flowed, I cried and cried. Not out of sadness, not out of fear, but just joy and love knowing that she was going through all of this for Garrett. She was so very brave. In the waiting room were Steve, Josh, my Mom, my sister Melissa and me. We talked and waited, sat silently and waited. It was like a 1950s waiting experience. After what seemed like eternity, we walked into the hall and I started pacing. About that time a nurse wheeled a bassinet down the hall as she softly cried. "Oh. no" I said, "Something happened to that baby, the nurse is crying." She kept coming toward us. Then cheerfully she said through her tears, "Do you want to see your baby?" All the blood rushed out of my brain and I stared.

The baby was swaddled in a white blanket and gender neutral hat. "Is it a boy or a girl, I asked?" and the nurse unwrapped the baby and exclaimed, 'It's A Boy!" I could not take my eyes off of his, he opened them wide and looked right at me. My heart exploded! We had only a few seconds of silence with him when the rush of family came to see him. The nurses and the doctor were all crying along with us. Garrett was radiant!

I went into a trance of some sort, just staying plastered to the window as they cleaned, weighed, measured and took his footprints. He just lay there calmly, sucking two fingers.

About an hour later I got to hold for the first time. In a private room. Awestruck, I stared at him. Touched his tiny fingers, smelled his hair. I was a mother and he was my son, Garrett, The brave warrior.

Life had begun as I know it.

Today is Garrett's birthday. The most important day of the year and today Garrett is six years old.

Thank God for my son.

BirthParents- Kim and Steve

As we come closer to Christmas and rejoice in the birth of Jesus on December 25th, I go back in time to 2002 when I received the most important call of my life. Kim, my son's birthmom was in labor. YES, on Christmas day! My mind raced with joy, fear, anticipation on meeting my son or daughter, collecting things, feelings completely out of my body and knowing that I would in fact be a mother. The fact that I would be a mother is the most important part, given that I had always known that I would be one.
Over my life, I have been the mother to my little sister, Mimi. As well, the mother to hamsters, guinea pigs, cats, dogs, birds, fish, turtles, any living thing that needed nurturing; I was the mother.
My one prayer in life was to have the chance to be a mother to a child, my child. And the prayer was answered at 1:19 pm on Thursday, December 26, 2002 in Melbourne, Florida. Garrett my precious son was born and is now going to be six years old in a couple of days.
Hard to believe that the lifetime of worrying, working and wondering has flown by and we are all growing with Garrett. He is the beginning of life as we know it.
After six years, his birthparents, Kim and Steve, are still very much a part of our lives. Kim is a special education teacher in Florida and Steve is a physicist in Florida. They were High School sweethearts and dated after Garrett's birth. Kim has recently gotten married to Bill Price and they are an amazing couple. We had the good fortune to be a part of their wedding in June 2008.
As we come to the anniversary of two sets of parents being created on December 26, 2002, I pay homage to Kim and Steve. Having waited until she was 8 months pregnant to make a final decision, picking Garrett for us to be his parents and having the bravery to hand him to me when we left the hospital on December 29, 2002.
I have never and will never have a word or utterance to fully explain my love and gratitude for their love.
Merry Christmas and Happy Birthday to Garrett!
Love to Kim and Steve and Garrett's large extended family!

Happy Holidays from HeartMommy

As you may have experienced, 'The Holidays', seem to sneak up and then they are all over and it is only 23 days until Christmas.

I write this blog as a precurser to the much anticipated VLOG and give only the excuse that I was on vacation in Florida, soaking as much warmth and sun in, until my return yesterday to snow and cold in North Carolina.

Prior to leaving, I had the great pleasure of attending the Jewels That Dance National Adoption Month event, I used my FLIP video camera to do and interview and I made it all into a movie...it was so much fun!

Now having said that, I have not posted it yet, because, well...I am trying.

Tonight, when my son nods off in dreams of dinosaurs and space exploration, I will post it.

Being a mom, business owner, writer, photographer and trying to have a few days of decompression seem to cause REcompression on the return. But, I am so grateful for the days I had in Florida, spending time with my family, swimming in the Atlantic, and laying by the pool in WARMTH.

Okay, now I am rambling.... more to come tonight. :)

Happy Tuesday,

NM- HeartMommy

FLIP VLOG Diaries of Adoption

Have you ever won anything?

I have won two things in my life. Once I won at a real bingo game where the take was about $8.00!!

Secondly, I just won a FLIP digital video camera!! newbaby.com and FLIP collaborated; looking for pregnant and new moms to VLOG. Well, since I am neither, but Adoption has created a family in my life and so many others, I asked to be included in the opportunity.

And, they said YES! So, on Friday, I received my FLIP camera-it is something!! So small, so very cool, and EASY. The easy part is the best, because I am a bit on the techslow road and even I could follow the very explicit directions.

The most amazing feature on the camera is the USB port is built in! You FLIP it out, plug the tiny camera into your computer and there you have it..downloaded and ready to go for another hour of recording.

I LOVE IT!! So, my next BLOG will be a VLOG...this is an amazing world we live in, I am too excited for all the fun.

Bring it on Sophia Coppola; I have a FLIP!

*The photo is at the Adoption event at Jewels That Dance. AND yes, that is a real police officer and a REAL Macheosuarus (i.e. Garrett). They were discussing the finer points of Cops, cookies, and dinosaurs.

Isn't It Funny

Isn't It Funny?

Today, as I watched my son play dinosaurs in our yard, I thought how much he had changed.

And to see his intense concentration in Kindergarten Chess. Yes, Chess...he really gets it too. The sponge of the child's mind is a delight.

He is taller, his face is more mature, and now he sings songs while playing. Tonight as we chatted before bedtime, he started giggling and could not stop, his little face crinkled up with silliness. And yet, as I look over the website and the photo site with his pictures, there is so little change.

On the far left of the photo site is Garrett so small, days old if that, with a small smile. On the far right is Garrett now. He has the same smile, the same eyes and the same nose.

Tonight, as I browse these familiar photos I think, isn't it funny, no matter what is happening in the world today, what is happening in our lives, things are as they are meant to be.

http://heartmommy.shutterfly.com/

(Top left 2002 and Top right 2008)

In the middle are Kim and Steve at our first meeting after Garrett was born.

Garrett is a beautiful soul. He will always be.



HeartMommy

HeartMommy Asheville Onsie Revealed

Here it is!

The newest item in the HeartMommy product line; the Asheville Onsie!

The idea for this series came after a late evening session with my 'team'...Denise and Katharina; they rock!

The pattern reminded us of looking into a kaleidoscope and we added orange stitching to make it pop. The HeartMommy logo is in the center of the Onsie...I love it!

There are hearts everywhere in the pattern...All you need is love, baby!



HeartMommy

We are Live and in Living Color!

Today I am 42 years old! It is my birthday!

HeartMommy.com just went live moments ago; what a great birthday present!!

Please visit http://www.heartmommy.com/ and take a look around.

Welcome!
Nancy- HeartMommy to Garrett